Pitbull, we get it…you’re Cuban.

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Of course Taylor Swift had the opening spot for the night. She recreated her “Blank Space” video on stage featuring heavy, no, HEAVY backup vocals as she nonchalantly plays with flaming roses, mimes in golden picture frames, and a smoke filled stage. This performance was so choreographed it was actually hard to watch. Taylor was too focused on her acting role on the stage, when she should have focused on her vocals…as usual. Too bad the song is so damn addicting.

One Direction won for best Pop/Rock band or duo. The boys accepted the award by saying, “Thank you to Simon Cowell, who got us here” and “America feels like a second home.” Congrats gentlemen!

Charli XCX’s performance of “Boom Clap” made you feel as if you just stepped into a 90’s high school prom, complete with pink and white balloon arches, as well as an all girl band. Charli wore a pale blue dress with red rimmed sunglasses that look like they came free with a Happy Meal, but somehow she makes it work. But the vibe quickly shifted into a pop/punk infusion as Charli performed her song “Break the Rules.” She was accompanied by a leather clad clan as they flipped her now tight latex covered body into a fit of rock rage. The only thing I could think about was how hard it would be to try and squeeze out of that super tight sweaty leather outfit after that performance. OUCHHH!!

Magic paired with Wyclef Jean could not have been a better mix. Both stepped out of a hazy reggae dream. Lead singer, Nasri Tony Atweh blinded the crowd with his camo looking Tom’s and was throwing up the peace sign every chance he could.

Iggy Azalea won for best Rap/Hip-Hop album and accepted her award saying, ” This award is the first award I’ve ever won in my entire life.” T.I. looked on patting her back like the proudest Dad in the world.

I finally found the difference between 5 Seconds of Summer and One Direction. 5SOS were the kids smoking in the high school parking lot and One Direction were the kids studying in the library.

Imagine Dragons gave an electric performance of their new single “I Bet My Life.” These guys never disappoint and brought their A-game as a hyped up gospel choir danced and sang along to the song.

Sam Smith swept up the award for Pop/Rock Male. Obviously… Sam accepted the award saying, “Thank you to my fan base, you guys are amazing. Last year I wrote an album about being lonely and tonight I couldn’t feel futher from lonely.” AWWW! We love you Sam!

Sam Smith followed his award by a classy performance of his mega hit “I’m Not the Only One.” A$AP Rocky paid a visit during the performance. Smith followed the trend of rap cameos but kept it tasteful and true to his usual charm. Oh yeah, and his voice is as smooth and warm as cookie batter that came out of the oven a little too early.

Iggy Azalea stormed the stage with her song “Fancy” and then onto her newest hit “Beg For It.” Iggy strutted around the stage like she built it.

Lorde performed “Yellow Flicker Beat” starting with a melancholy close up of her classic deep dark lips and black diamond chokers gracefully draped around her neck. Taylor Swift dramatically sang and danced along to her BFF as she spasm’d on stage in the most perfect way.

Ariana Grande sang her soul out in a black lace gown complete with a jazzy rendition of her song “Problem” and “Break Free.” Ariana was so in her element, it was actually hypnotizing to watch. She then sang “Love Me Harder” accompanied by a burnt lobster…wait that was just The Weeknd. Brother Frankie looked like the heart-eye emoji as he watched his sister grace us all with her presence.

Pitbull performed on top of a huge globe just in case you forgot that one of his names is “Mr. Worldwide.” He sang “Fireball” with what looked to be the cast of Deal or No Deal but with way less clothes.

Imagine Dragons won for Alternative Artist and accepted the award saying, “To be a musician there is no better career.” These guys deserved it!

Selena Gomez gave her most emotional performance ever. Imagery flooded the large screen behind her as she poured her heart into the microphone singing “The Heart Wants What It Wants.” She ended the song with tears in her eyes and left the audience saying, “Wow, Selena Gomez can actually sing.”

One Direction played up the romance on stage with a dark blue moonlight scene behind them as they sang their beautiful new song “Night Changes.” Close up shots of each member singing their parts made the song more personal. It still amazes me how good they all sound together.

Nicki Minaj looked gorgeous in an all white gown; changing her image while spitting rhymes just like her “Pink Friday” days.

Taylor Swift won the Dick Clark Award for Excellence handed to her by the beautiful anti-aging Diana Ross. Taylor accepted the award and said, “Music should be consumed in albums and albums should be consumed as art.” PREACH.

Fergie was reppin’ the West coast and proud of it. Donned in way too much gold jewelry while back up dancers wore cropped sweatshirts and rocked corn rows. Although it’s easy to assume that “L.A. Love (lala)” won’t be around very long. Pop hit; hot now, gone forever.

Garth Brooks performed surrounded by die hard fans. Country concert: Where the people hold their beers up more than their phones.

Mary J. Blige – Girl… WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN? By the way, she looks the same as she did 10 years ago. GORGEOUS.

Jessie J starts off “Bang Bang” by canoodling with celebs like Khloe Kardashian, Taylor Swift, and Sam Smith. Jessie’s sultry yet raspy voice is unbelievable. I have loved this woman since day one and I will continue to be in awe of her talent. Add a dash of Nicki Minaj and a side of Ariana Grande and you have a nice big diva salad. All together now…YAAAAAAAAAS!

Speaking of divas…JLO closed the show with her song “Booty.” She absolutely killed it. I felt like I was watching my good friend Jenny from the block dance her @$$ off for a solid four minutes. JLO walked across the stage with a flock of accomplished dancers as if we were watching JLO: The Musical. Damn…

God bless America and God bless music.




The VMA’s…
Ariana sang
Nicki twerked
Iggy twerked
Beyonce twerked
Hell Usher bounced his head off Nicki’s butt while she was twerking…
Like…why…just why? (

Butts ruled the VMA’s- it’s undeniable.

Female domination is one way to describe the 2014 MTV VMA’s. Everywhere you looked, there was another diva singing another hit with no pants on, complete with a lot of sASS.

Ariana opened the show (serves her right, the girl is topping every pop chart right now) with “Break Free” which definitely could’ve been better. I think her nerves got the best of her and it would’ve helped if she didn’t dance around as much as she did.

Once Nicki Minaj and Jessie J hit the stage to sing “Bang Bang” Ariana looked 10,000 times more comfortable and really crushed her verse.

By the way I have come to the conclusion that Ariana Grande is actually a real-life babydoll.


Katy Perry’s music video for “Dark Horse” won “Best Female Video” which I highly disagree with. “Partition” deserved it… No doubt.

Look at that flexibility!!! (

Taylor Swift swung back in time to perform her new song “Shake It Off” in her classic “I’m not a country girl anymore, look at me” type of way. Her singing (or trying to) was actually painful to watch. It seems like she put more effort into her performance than she put into her voice.

If you have a hit song, you should be able to perform it live. If not, then don’t put it on your album (Beyonce is proof of that, by being able to perform every song live) Taylor tried hard for people not to see that the backup vocals were doing 99% of the work because her terrible dancing was doing the rest. It was seriously embarrassing to watch.

See...even she knows it. (
See…even she knows it.

Meanwhile, Sam Smith and Katy Perry win for having the cutest friendship. Every time the camera panned to the pair, they were either sipping drinks, leaning on each other, or taking selfies. It was adorable.


Speaking of Sam Smith. His incredible performance of “Stay With Me” could not have been more flawless. He deserves to be on a stage for the rest of his existence. There are so many great things awaiting that man.

“MTV welcome to my world.” Beyoncé closed the show by performing her entire album in a show stopping 16 minute performance… That’s right. Apparently the rumors I read online were right. She performed a snippet of every song off her surprise album that came out last year… Every song was another group of talented dancers, another gorgeous backdrop, and appropriate lighting to fit the style of every song. There is no doubt that Beyoncé and her team spent countless hours rehearsing this performance of a lifetime. She really did something unreal at the VMA’s and it will go down in VMA history.

Donning a stained/shattered glass leotard and her famous dirty blonde curls she left her sweat, swag, and sexiness on that VMA stage.


Cue baby Blue sitting on Jay’s lap and dancing along to her famous momma and you had everyone in the room completely enlightened. There is no one more deserving of the Video Vanguard award than the Queen herself.

Tears in her eyes and gold in her hands, Beyonce said to the crowd “I’m so full…I just thank god for this moment…”


Congrats Bey and to all VMA winners!